Time Off

Life in the State of Mania

Time off – when you hear those words what do you think of ? … Is it the ocean, its waves lapping in and out against the sandy beach in front of you? How do you feel? … Could it be the warmth of the sand beneath you, and the fading sun on your face? A calm washing over you, like the nights ocean breeze, and your thoughts are only of this moment, with no thoughts of anything beyond this place and time.

Does that sound a good? Well for me it does.

But what happens when time off means … She said; “I am leaving you for a few weeks to gather my thoughts about our marriage, and our future?”

No surprise you knew that this time off was coming, that your marriage was, and has been struggling for some time now. So why all the drama?

Now what do you think of, or how do you feel? Did that big ocean wave just come crashing in on you, driving you down and lapping your body across the sand like wood across sand paper? The shock, like a bucket of cold water hits you where you lye on the beach, your muscles stiffen you raise up and gasp for that first breath that was washed away with the cold water.

You thoughts say: “My God, What just happen, … What is going on?” What happened is that she had more mental strength than you. Also that she was willing to leave, what she is after only she knows.

Does that sound like a good time off … Well for that moment … that first moment … No. Then what becomes of the moments after? Can you get that first time off back? Do – you – want that first time off back, if so have you learned anything to make the time off better? If going back in time has taught us anything (on TV) it is that; you – will – not – learn – anything.

So as you see you can’t get time back, and your no longer in possession of your time off , she controls all time off you have missed your way, feelings and time have been wasted.

Time off – when you hear those words what do you think of? How do you feel?

Fact or Fiction ???

Writing in the State of Mania

So the Bipolar Disorder is it a fact or fiction? The fact is that depression is real, and comes in many forms. from being blue, to being medicated for a time, to being medicated for a lifetime.

So doesn’t that describe being Bipolar?, I think for sure that the above description it is no less than a foundation for the Bipolar Disorder. So if you look at the link you will read a huge description of bipolar, but the symptomatology seems to mimic just about every mood know to man. So depending on the day, you can show symptoms of every mental disorder known to man, and with that I have just explained Multiple Personality Disorder.

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Now if you read this Classification of Disease link which is long and boring it will help to define Mental Disorders. This is the official book of diseases and there is a whole chapter on Mood Disorders. Now if you look at the baby to the right What kind of mood do you think she is in? Who Cares! She makes me smile, she is better than any pill. I got of topic for a moment there.

So back to the topic, it is in my opinion that depression is the foundation for many of these — Moods. The extension into the various disorders come from external factors in the life of those afflicted. Believe me those that say a parent, sibling, relation, friend or an acquaintance couldn’t affect the way they act as an adult are sadly mistaken.

My “Eyes Wide Open” moment came when I realised that one day my move into a mania mode was caused by a comment to me that my (and I use this loosely) father, had inflicted upon me for years. So was my mania embedded in a disorder? or created by a father (external factor) that was entirely out of control, with the fact that I had not overcome the emotional abuse.

So my definition of Bipolar disorder it is — Depression with the addition of an external factor. This external factor is something that causes great pain in the life of the person with the Depression Disorder.