“Lost Time”

Life in the State of Mania

surreal-artwork-time-clockHave you felt that you “lost time” somewhere, if you don’t stay in the “Now” according to Eckhart Tolle in the book “Power of Now” you are always looking back over your shoulder at the time wasted. As you age this time wasted becomes nothing more than a prison from which you will never recover the time lost. Why am I going down this road, because I am imprisoned with this lost time scenario and I am now watching my 35 year old son be imprisoned by his tormented mind.  He has days of clarity but mostly he lives in a blur — his mind spiraling out of control and there is nothing I am capable of doing to stop the unwinding of the world he lives in.

lost time It is painful when your caught looking back and unable to stay right here in the now. Time Travel itself was probably created in the mind of a person that was unhappy with the now and began dreaming of the possibility to go back and fix the past in hopes that the now would be much better. But the past isn’t the only place that we get stuck, those of us that can’t be present in the now also dream to live in a better future; and once again the “What Ifs” cloud our minds and when tomorrow comes and we are unable to have that dream come true that we ‘what if’d” in the yesterday, more depression sets in along with the pain of the unfulfilled life we have created.

time-travel-fantasy-artMine and my 35 year old sons anxiety/depression seems to take form in lifes that are unfulfilled or at least in our minds are not fulfilled. I believe that even if we had everything we wanted we would still be living out the past or years into the future. We wish for time back and then dream each day away and miss the simple things that this moment may have giving us and our lives move by so quickly; and I know it is all because of our state of mind. To dream and to what if our lives away is such a waste of time and to wake up tens of years later in life is such a loss in so many ways.

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